Valentine’s day

Ah… Valentine’s day. The one and only day when people all around the world (not all of them, but I like to exaggerate)  say “I love you” to their partner (see how politically correct I am). Forget the other 364 days. Nope folks, those are just meaningless; they are used to prepare yourself physically and mentally for this sole (and shallow, commercial etc) day.  But I am not going to take some nationalist route or be a hypocrite by saying that Romania already has a traditional holiday that is similar to Valentine’s Day – Dragobete. If people want to spend money (and do it twice) on flowers, cards and candy, let them do that. They’ll cry over the spilled milk money spent later.

I want to talk about Valentine’s day – The movie. In case you were wondering, no I didn’t spend the equivalent of a meal on a ticket to the cinema to see it. And I wouldn’t see this movie even if it was free of charge. I’ve got better things to do like seeing Spaced… again. (I ‘ll do it anyway thankyouverymuch)

But I do love me some movie bashing once in a while. Especially since the cast includes so many oh-so-famous actors such as: Bradley Cooper, Jessica Biel (still as expressive as a cardboard cutout, I believe), Jessica Alba (same as Jessica Biel), Jamie Foxx, Taylor Swift, Taylor Lauter (the guy boy who gives wet dreams to all those Twitards; and now he is 18), Anne Hathaway, Ashton Kutcher and … oh no, not you too… Topher Grace (the guy who played Eric Forman in That 70’s show). I’ve just lost my faith in humanity.

Since I’m not talented enough to write a review that will make you laugh, I’ll leave you with an excerpt from Dustin Rowles’ article (and you’d better read it, because it’s so deliciously caustic and devious it will make you giggle).

It’s cheap; ineffectively manipulative; and emptier than a single man’s nightstand Kleenex box the morning after binging on microwave pizza and pay-per-porn. […] It’s 659 tiny romantic vignettes that intersect like a mid-air collision and hardly anyone comes out of it with their dignity intact. It’s lousy, predictable, moronic, gushy, lame and phony, and the only difference between Valentine’s Day and a mugging is that at least a mugger might be sweet enough to knock you unconscious while he takes your money.